Lessons for Life with James Long, Jr.
Are you longing to find answers to the deeper issues of life? Join James, a pastor, counselor, and university professor with over 30 years of experience. Hear James as he tackles some of life's biggest questions and helps us find God's solutions to life's struggles. Learn the power of living by God's grace and for His glory. Experience the joy of forgiveness and freedom found in Jesus Christ alone. If you are on a search for freedom, you will love being part of this conversation. Subscribe, and enjoy the show!
Lessons for Life with James Long, Jr.
How to Handle Difficult People with Wisdom and Grace
ABOUT JAMES AND LESSONS FOR LIFE
Are you longing to find answers to the deeper issues of life? Join Dr. James Long, Jr., a pastor, counselor, and university professor with over 30 years of experience. Hear James as he tackles some of life’s biggest questions and helps us find God’s solutions to life’s struggles. Learn the power of living by God’s grace and for His glory. Experience the joy of forgiveness and freedom found in Jesus Christ alone. If you are in search of freedom, you will love being part of this conversation. Subscribe, and enjoy the show!
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Episode 4, wisdom for Difficult People Series. Wisdom for Every Relationship. Hi, friends, and welcome back to Lessons for Life with James Long Jr. It's a joy to have you with me today. We're moving forward with our Wisdom for Every Relationship series, and today's topic is one that touches every single one of us.
Speaker 1:How do we walk wisely with difficult people? One of us how do we walk wisely with difficult people? If you've ever felt drained, frustrated or even discouraged by a difficult relationship, you're not alone. The good news is that God's Word gives us wisdom for exactly these situations. Let us dive in together.
Speaker 1:Everyone has difficult people in their lives. It might be a family member who never apologizes, a co-worker who always criticizes, or a friend who drains your emotional energy, or even a fellow believer who seems impossible to please. Our natural response is often to fight back, withdraw in frustration or gossip about them behind their backs. But Scripture calls us to a different path, a wiser path, a gospel-shaped way of relating, even when it's hard. Today we'll look at how to engage with difficult people without losing your peace, your integrity or your testimony.
Speaker 1:Let's begin with a few Scripture. In Romans 12, verse 18, it says this If possible, so far as it depends upon you. Live peaceably with all. Proverbs 15, verse 1, reminds us A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. And James 3, verse 17, describes God's wisdom as pure, then peaceable, gentle, open to reason, full of mercy and good fruits. Notice, scripture never guarantees that relationships will be easy, but it consistently calls us to live with wisdom, peace and humility, even when others don't First. Examine yourself first Before labeling someone else as difficult. Wisdom invites us to self-reflection, as Jesus said in Matthew 7, verse 3, why do you see the speck that is in your brother's eye but you do not notice the log that is in your own eye? Ask yourself have I contributed to the tension? Am I reacting out of pride, fear or insecurity? Have I communicated clearly and humbly? Sometimes what we perceive as difficulties in others may actually reveal areas God wants to address in us. Second, refuse to take the bait.
Speaker 1:Difficult people often stir our emotions, whether it's intentional or not. Wisdom means choosing self-control over impulsive reaction. Proverbs 26, verse 4, says Do not answer a fool according to his folly, lest you become like him yourself. You don't have to engage every accusation. You don't have to defend every misunderstanding. You don't have to match anger with anger. A gentle answer often de-escalates tension faster than you think.
Speaker 1:Third, set loving boundaries. Jesus loved everyone, but he didn't entrust himself to everyone. Sometimes wisdom means creating healthy distance while maintaining a posture of love. Proverbs 23, verse 3, says the prudent sees danger and hides himself, but the simple go on and suffer for it. You can limit emotional access with chronically hurtful people. Clarify expectations and communicate boundaries. Walk away kindly when engagement would only fuel conflict. Setting boundaries is not unloving, it's an act of stewardship.
Speaker 1:Imagine a co-worker who constantly criticizes you, both privately and publicly. The worldly response might be to lash out gossip or to sabotage them in return. But godly wisdom says respond gently when confronted. Set a private meeting to clarify issues. If needed, refuse to carry bitterness in your heart. You might not change the co-worker's behavior, but you can guard your own heart and maintain your witness.
Speaker 1:Take a moment to reflect who in your life consistently feels difficult to engage with. How have you been responding? Reactively or wisely? Where might God be inviting you to set healthier boundaries and to extend surprising grace? You are responsible for your faithfulness, not for the other person's responses. This week, here's your challenge Identify one difficult relationship.
Speaker 1:Pray specifically for that person by name. Ask God for wisdom to respond with grace, truth and self-control. You may not be able to change them, but by God's grace, you can change the atmosphere you bring in that relationship. If you'd like to continue growing in relational wisdom, I invite you to join our community at communityjameslongjrorg. That's communityjameslongjrorg. There you'll find resources, encouragement and support for navigating every kind of relationship through the lens of the gospel. If you want to explore different membership options and the many tools available, visit our website, jameslongjrorg slash.
Speaker 1:Sign up now. We would love to walk this journey with you. Let's pray together. Father, thank you for your patience with us. Teach us to extend the same patience and wisdom to those who are difficult in our lives. Give us the strength to love those without enabling sin, and the courage to set boundaries without bitterness and the grace to forgive even when it is hard. Make us instruments of your peace in this broken world. In your son's name we pray, amen. Well, thank you for joining us today. I look forward to being with you next time as we explore wisdom for the workplace.
